I don't do resolutions, because I really suck at them. I don't like to look back, unless it's something so bad that I might actually learn from it. And since I'm way too superstitious to wish anything good for myself (lest I somehow piss off the karma gods), I thought I'd instead offer up a more general list of New Year's wishes:
1. I wish for peace and happiness for those of you in turmoil. Remember that this, too, shall pass. It always does.
2. I wish we could all just finally get along (in the words of poor Rodney King. Remember him?) Of course, this won't happen. I mean, I didn't just fall off the turnip truck yesterday. But I can wish, can't I?
3. I wish nothing but good things for my friends and family.
4. I wish the Cubs could just once win it all. Really. Just once. Then I could die happy.
5. I wish everyone could find their soulmate in life. I did.
6. I wish we could go back to the Moon. Space travel is so cool. I wish my sons could experience what I did back in 1969, when Neil Armstrong stepped onto the Lunar suface and gave me a massive case of goosebumps.
7. I wish Led Zeppelin would get back together and tour again.
8. I wish for security for the insecure of the world. You know who you are.
9. I wish I had one more wish to make this an even ten.
10. I wish I hadn't wimped out on that last wish...
Happy New Year.